In my grandfather’s retirement home, an elderly woman 

sings “I’ve Been Working on the Railroad”

and I want to laugh and cry and die right there

on the polyester red carpet before I’m sent

to a rickety old house filled with nurses and Clorox

and strawberry Jello topped with sugar-free Cool Whip,

before an emergency button is glued to my door,

before my canines fall out eating corn on the cob,

before my back is hunched and humped and my ass

cannot be wiped without assistance from a nurse

named Marge who is just trying to put her two sons

through community college, but would really like

to touch less butts if it’s okay with Management.

Before my kids resent me and leave me to rot,

and my husband divorces me for a younger woman,

and my liver fails from all that wine. Before all that,

please just let me die right here and now while I’m still

youngish and dewyish and punch drunk on the wildness

of the world. Forget staying alive all the live-long day.

Let me out of this life while I still love it.

JILLIAN STACIA is the author of the upcoming poetry collection, SET THE BONE, published by Arcana Poetry Press. She was selected as an Honorable Mention for the 2025 Jack McCarthy Book Prize and short-listed for the 2026 Central Avenue Poetry Prize. She has been nominated for several awards, including 2025 Best of Net and the 2025 Pushcart Prize. Her poetry has been featured in several literary magazines and anthologies. Find her online @jillianstacia to read more of her work.