Tom doesn’t know what the expression “alas” means, but alas, it keeps ping-ponging around his mind, and Tom is often kept awake at night by embarrassing interactions from months ago and unsaid words from years ago, and he fears that his lack of sleep could be affecting his immune system, and he walks through dark spaces barefoot knowing there’s something he could trip over, but when the lights are on he feels even more uncomfortable, especially when he glances into the mirror, and he contemplates whether he should get that rash on his face checked out by a doctor because the moisturizer he’s putting on it isn’t making it go away, and he recalls all the times people have urged him to come out of his shell, only for him to wish he actually had a shell, and he debates whether he locked the door after closing down his shift working as a clerk at the locksmith shop, and the clock in the corner says it’s half past time to get new batteries, but Tom can’t afford them right now, and in order to save money on electricity bills he’s gotten into the habit of lighting candles, and he thinks about how a living room is only a living room if you’re having a good time, and he keeps seeing the letters “alas” everywhere, from fashion galas on dusty magazines, to the koalas on the shower curtain in the bathroom, to the State of Alaska novelty license plate displayed on the shelf, to the logo on the off-brand sweatshirt with the two stripes that his dad gifted him several Christmases ago and it doesn’t fit him anymore but it’s the only tangible memory he has left of his dad, and Tom finally decides to look up what the word “alas” means, but alas, the dictionary is on fire.
Zach Keali’i Murphy is a Hawaii-born writer with a background in cinema. His stories appear in The MacGuffin, Reed Magazine, The Coachella Review, Lunch Ticket, Raritan Quarterly, Another Chicago Magazine, Little Patuxent Review, Flash Frog, and more. He has published the chapbook Tiny Universes (Selcouth Station Press). He lives with his wonderful wife, Kelly, in St. Paul, Minnesota.